I Screwed.

Yeah. Ya know what? I already done it. Ruined my own life, with NOTHING. Have ya ever imagine about living your life with nothing? It's useless man, and i thought i screwed it. I have many friends, but i pretending to be like them. I'm not being myself. Learning how to be someone that they really thought that she must there. Always, i learn how to do it, they respect you. uh-huh. But i couldn't. I'm not Sara Stanley who had magical voices. Or, Anne Shirley with those big grey eyes filled with dreams could make people easy to love them.

But i'm ugly, i'm.....jerk. Really, i'm those kind. No, no, not with the negative POV, but a really sensitive thing about my behaviour.

I used to be a freaky girl. i don't give a damn care for the silly thought of them. Because i got a full package of back up, here, at the new place, i'm alone. And i'm afraid of being like i used to. I'm a kind of smart, loony, disturbing, if-she-is-not-the-number-one-i-would-not-let-she-in thought. Okay, sometimes i'm over it. But, the rest is all right..

I just need love okay?

My parents gave me enough. But i felt kinda lonely. They both works. Go home at night, didn't have much time just to hear i'm chirping. Saturday dan Sunday is break day. Sleeping like a baby again, but after they woke up their voice echoing the house again like the trombone.

i don't have true friend. Bestfriend? Yeah, got some. But true, i didn't. That makes me feel kinda lonely. Yeah, i screwed. I don't really need to hav a boyfriend at least now. But i always want to have a True Friend. Really Friend. More that it, like a Soulmate but i'm not her ribs. That's creepy. I'm not a lesbian, for sure. If you doubt me.

Ah, ah, ah. I really screwed. Now, Alecta Carrow on her way. But who cares? Who is this Carrow anyway?